A Different Tune
by 2shy the Shippy
Summary: Penelope’s accusation of him becoming personal with Tamara was initially false, but circumstances have changed since the discussion. Derek was unsure as to how he was feeling; should he really get personal with a victim’s sister or stay away as Penelope?
1. She Will Be Loved

Disclaimer: Isn't this getting a bit repetitive? We all know that I or, anyone else for that matter, doesn't own Criminal Minds, hence, wait for it...**fan**fiction.

"I don't mind spending everyday

Out on the corner in the pouring rain

Look for the girl with the broken smile

Ask her if she wants to stay for a while

And she will be loved

and she be loved"

-Maroon 5, She Will Be Loved

Derek silently walked Tamara back to her apartment while he tried to put his thoughts in order. Recently, chaos has become the norm and he knew it came with the job, but not like this. There were a lot of things going on at once and he wished it would slow down. How did things get so chaotic and unrecognizable? Where did it begin? Or, better yet, where does it end? Derek wished he knew, but if he did know, what would he do? The options were limitless and was there a right answer, or were they all wrong and you had to go with the lesser of the evils? Nothing ever stays the same and everyone around him is moving forth, except him. He still is where he was years ago as far as his personal life was concern. As for his professional life, he was progressing and becoming a more efficient agent. But, he wanted more and maybe even needed it.

"Derek," Tamara said while she stood in front of her door looking at him. He turned to her and raised an eyebrow. "Is something wrong?"

"No, why?" He answered automatically. If there was something wrong, which there was, he wouldn't tell her. It had everything to do with trust and, no, it wasn't personal, but he didn't know her that well.

"You just seemed to be spaced out." She observed. Normally Derek was very attentive when they spent time together, even when they weren't talking. Tamara then joked, "Luckily, I wasn't talking or I would have been talking to myself."

No truer statement has ever been uttered. Derek definitely wasn't paying enough attention to even know that she hadn't said a word. Penelope's accusation of him becoming personal with Tamara was initially false, but circumstances has changed since the discussion. Derek was unsure as to how he was feeling; should he really get personal with a victim's sister or stay away as Penelope warned? Tamara seemed like a good woman. A woman who knew how to tend to a man and Derek sure as hell needed to be attended to. But, was it a risk he was willing to take? And if they were to get close, would either or them be willing to pull away?

Tamara wasn't like any of the women Derek usually flirted or fooled around with: she was intelligent, aware, funny, and beautiful, not sexy, but beautiful. Beauty was natural, not forced and it's honest and she was it. He liked being around her. Usually, he would put on his playboy front, put the agent couldn't do it with Tamara; she understood him without him explaining himself. She didn't need to know details, she just understood the emotions and the intensity of it.

Just as much as Derek was unsure as to what he wanted, he knew Tamara was as well. He wasn't using his profiling skills, but his basic understanding of people. She wasn't sure if her attraction for him was because of him or if she was suffering from the hero syndrome. And even if she wasn't, she wasn't sure if she wanted to pursue those said feelings. Tamara most likely got asked out a lot, but she doesn't do well in relationships. They either don't last long or she stays in one because she feels obligated. Never has she fully enjoyed a relationship because it just worked and, the one time she did, she found out his feelings and outlook on their relationship weren't the same. Work was the only thing she could control and knew what to expect.

They were both misunderstood and put on facades to fit in.

Derek looked at the woman before him: a beautiful damaged woman who happened to be beautifully damaged. He wished he could change that. He didn't want to fix, but to mend her broken heart. It was a good thing she still believed in love, except, she didn't believe it would happen with her.

Derek Morgan was a man who took risks. Sometimes they paid off and sometimes they didn't, but he didn't live life by playing it safe. So, he cupped Tamara's face in his hands and passionately kissed her.

He could feel the initial resistance, and then the permission to continue as she melted into his arms. No man has ever kissed her the way that Derek was now. Not with such knowing and understanding. She hungrily responded trying to get as much out of him as she could.

And when they broke apart, they could hear their synchronized panting and shyly looked up at one another.

What happened next?

A week had passed without them uttering a word about the kiss. It was hard to acknowledge what had transgressed between the. Even though it was what they wanted, they still had their doubts and insecurities.

Derek had a long day at work and after he dropped his things off at home and check on Clooney, he went to the corner store to buy strong liquor. Although he wasn't much of a drinker, even during tough cases, there were those rare cases where he needed a strong substance in his system to get rid of the pain or the atrocities.

As he was walking home, it rained, but he could care less. When he got home he could simply take his clothes off and call it a day. As he approached his apartment, he saw a familiar car parked in front of it, Tamara's to be exact.

If one were to look into his eyes as Derek thought of what he should do next, they could see the inner conflict. He stood on the corner contemplating what the right answer might be. Should he tell her to go home or invite her in?

He quickly jogged over to Tamara's car and knocked on her window. She jumped before gathering herself, and then rolled down the window.

"Hey Derek," She said as she put her hand on her chest. "You kind of scared me; I thought you were in your apartment."

"No, I was up at the local grocery store." He told her while he stared at Tamara in a way that unnerved the woman. "Was there something you needed or did you just want to talk?"

"Uh...I was just driving through the neighborhood. I don't know why I stopped." She admitted while giving him a small smile. Derek could see she wanted to come in, but she wouldn't say it.

"How about you come in for a while," Derek nodded to his place. " Before it gets any worse out here? I would hate to think you are out in this storm all alone."

Tamara smiled before rolling up her window, killing the engine, and then opening her door. Derek used his coat as an umbrella for her as they tried to run as fast as they could to the door.

Nothing was ever going to be the same.

TBC...

AN: For those who are reading my story 'Midnight's Daydream', I haven't forgotten about it. I have had writer's block, but I plan to try to finish it soon. This story doesn't have an absolute directions, except, it will be Derek and Penelope.


	2. Pretty Wings

Disclaimer: Refer to first chapter

"Your face will be the reason I smile

But I will not see what I cannot have forever

I'll always love ya, I hope you feel the same"

-Maxwell, Pretty Wings

Derek looked at the layout of Tamara's home; he could tell she did a considerate amount of planning. Her pictures were strategically placed according to the mood of the room she wanted to portray. When you first walked into her home, you felt welcomed. The family room made you feel the close-knit bond of her family, and the rest of the house had certain themes, but it match the house and didn't take anything away. Tamara had a few expensive items here and there, but she spent her money mostly on her appearance. It wasn't as if she was trying to put on a front for others, she just liked to look a feel nice.

"How do you like my home, Agent Morgan?" Tamara asked as she handed him a bottle of beer. Derek raised an eyebrow and smirked at the bottle. Tamara crossed her arms. "What? I drink beer."

"I see." He knew that she didn't, but was doing it tonight since he was coming over.

"I just prefer wine," She said softly as shrugged, and then sat on the couch and opened her beer and sipped it. Derek went to sit next to her and shrugged off his jacket after he sat down. "Anyway, back to the question I had asked you earlier, how do you like my home?"

"I like it, I like it a lot, but not for the same reasons as you." Morgan said as he took a huge gulp of the provided beer. Even though Tamara wasn't much of a beer drinker, she did her homework, which was to be expected. The beer she bought was high quality and he knew it wasn't a fluke. She wasn't a woman of mistakes or accidents.

"Oh really, so why do you like my home?" Tamara asked inquisitively as she pulled her legs on the couch, and then partially sat on them.

"I occasionally help build and flip houses, so whenever I see I house I tear it apart in my mind, and then put it back together. I appreciate the quality, and then the content of a house, not just what the occupant wants me to see." Morgan took another sip of his beer before he continued. "That was what made me notice the different structure of the wall compared to..."

Derek caught himself, and then looked at his female companion.

"I'm so sorry, Tamara. It slipped." Tamara didn't say anything. She simply stared at the floor. "Maybe I should go?"

"No, please stay." She whispered very softly. "The wounds are still fresh, so it is hard to hear about my brother without getting emotional."

Derek moved to sit next to Tamara and took her hand in his. She looked at him and squeezed tightly. The agent then placed a tender kiss on her forehead before wrapping his arms around her.

Unmoving, Derek laid on the couch with Tamara wrapped in his arms. Her eyes were closed, but she wasn't sleep. The rhythm of Derek's heartbeat soothed her, so she listened. This was how it was supposed to be like. Someone was supposed to be there to hold and care for her when she needed it or just because. She shouldn't have to cry herself to sleep at night, they should just understand and Derek did.

Moments later, Derek's phone rang, but he didn't answer it.

"You aren't going to answer your phone?" Tamara lifted her head to look at Morgan.

"No, it's not important," Derek said as he rested his thumb and forefinger on her chin.

"You don't know that." She countered.

"I do." Tamara looked at him with determination. Morgan pulled his phone out his pocket and flipped it open.

"Morgan." He said by way of greeting.

"Hey Derek," Penelope said cheerfully. "I was wondering if you had any plans tonight."

A smile graced Derek's face as soon as he heard her voice. Spending time with Penelope was always wonderful and he wouldn't exchanged those past moments for anything in the world, but now his life has taken a different course. Although his baby girl meant the world to him, he couldn't push pause on his life. Though no one ever asked him to, Morgan found himself holding his breath whenever it came to the computer technician.

He thought if he waited it out, she would come to him. So, he waited and waited and waited and, no no avail, she never came. Morgan knew that a direct approach wouldn't work with Penelope; she was too stubborn to see anything that wasn't her way. He focused all of his attention on his that he missed other opportunities, but that wasn't going to happen anymore. Morgan saw his faults and was going to correct them.

"Actually, I'm in the middle of something right now." Derek said while he stared a Tamara and gently placed a kiss on her lips. Penelope represented the old Morgan, she was the past; Tamara was his present, his future. He was tired living in the past.

"Oh, I'm sorry to interrupt." In the pit of her stomach, Penelope knew who he was with. Unknown feelings started to parade her heart and mind. "I'll see you Monday, bye."

"Bye." Derek said back to her. "I love you."

"Love you, too." The connection went dead.

"Told you, nothing important." He sat his phone on Tamara's table before placing more kisses on her lips. She reciprocated just as hungrily and pushed him further back on the couch. Derek rested his hands on hers and pulled her close.

Tamara then straddled Derek and stretched his arms behind his head. They looked at one another for a moment.

"I'm afraid that I could fall in love with you," She admitted. Derek stared at her and thought, 'Is that what is like to wear your heart on your sleeve?' Tamara was honest which meant he couldn't play any games, but he never intended in the first place.

"Don't be," Derek sat up so he could be eye level with Tamara. "Because if you get there, I would like you to show me how to love someone the right way."

Tamara's eyebrows wrinkled before she silently started crying. Simultaneously, Tamara and Derek wiped her falling tears as she laughed while crying. Derek's words were the sweetest thing anyone has ever said to her and he meant it. Tamara threw her arms around Derek to pull him close.

Without a doubt, Tamara was his future.


End file.
